We’re all just trying to raise kind humans, right? As they grow up we teach them to say “please” and “thank you.” We teach them how to make friends and how to treat others. We teach them about forgiveness and how to apologize. All of these are important lessons, but do we practice what we preach?
Becoming a mother has been the most incredible experience of my life. I’ve experienced the highest highs and the lowest lows and everything in between, and my daughter isn’t even four years old yet. It has brought so many blessings and so many challenges and every day there is something new for me to learn. It’s a bit of an emotional roller coaster, really. More often than I’d like to admit, I’ve lost my cool and raised my voice or spoken to my daughter in a way I always said I never would. Which is how I learned the importance of saying I am sorry.
When it’s been a long day and I snap at my daughter, I apologize. When she asks me for something for the millionth time and I respond in an unkind way, I apologize. When she is trying to “help” but really messes something up and I lash out, I apologize. I know it sounds like I’m a pushover, but it’s really not that way. I see too many parents believing that they are right 100% of the time, when the reality is, we are not perfect. We are human and make mistakes all the time. Admitting this to our children will not make them lose respect for us, but will help them realize it’s okay for them to make mistakes too.
I have noticed a change in my daughter as I’ve owned up to my mistakes. She does the same and is quick to apologize when she is in the wrong. It’s also brought us closer together and has deepened my appreciation for her ability to be so quick to forgive. She’s only three, but I know that in the future this will allow us to be more open with one another as we recognize our imperfections and love each other despite them.
I’ve learned that actions really do speak louder than words. If there is a behavior you want to teach your child, you need to model it for them. That’s why I’ll always be willing to apologize to my children.
