Part 3 :: Building A Relationship
When I first spoke to my parents about finding my birth mom, my mom asked me what kind of relationship I was looking for. I told her I already had a mom and a dad, I didn’t need or want a relationship like that. If I decided to have a relationship with my birth mom, I wanted it to be as friends, with appreciation to the role she played in my life.
A day after speaking to Sherry on the phone, pure panic and fear filled my soul. I started to question if I could maintain a relationship with them and if it could be a fulfilling relationship for them. I wasn’t sure I could be what they expected or wanted. For me, I didn’t remember them or life with them, but for them, they had spent almost two years knowing and loving me. They remembered what I was like, and how it felt for me to leave. They remembered my birthday and had conversations about me. I had no expectations as I had only read the very vague descriptions.
A day after speaking to Sherry on the phone, pure panic and fear filled my soul. I started to question if I could maintain a relationship with them, and if it could be a fulfilling relationship for them.
I was so afraid to disappoint them and not be what they expected. In the end, I don’t think they really had expectations of me, but in my head, they were expecting so much. I think they were just excited to finally connect.
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Though we haven’t met in person, I’m sure plans will be made and we will all be able to sit down and just talk and get to know about each other’s lives in person. I truly look forward to that day. For now, though I’m just appreciating that we all found each other and I’m grateful for the respect they have shown me and the acknowledgment of my life, my parents, and my family. I’m so excited to see these relationships blossom.